Dude, I drove an El Camino, and dude it was one sweet ride

One thing I appreciate about having children is the chance to go through school again. Flash cards are for me too. So when I was out last weekend with a new guy and he said, “I was twenty-two when I found out I had a two year old son” and I know that son is nine years old now, that means this man was 29. That’s 18 years younger than me. Flash cards.

I kept this info to myself. He knew I was older, just not how much. The differences between us were huge and comical. I’ve never been called “dude” so much in my life. Actually ever in my life. I’m a chick not a dude, right? That’s probably old school.

And the sex thing came up - way too soon in my forty something world. Date number one really? Actually half way through date one, so more like date one-half. He said, “I didn’t know I’d like you so much so I didn’t bring a condom. If I had, I’d rock your world. You don’t have one? Dude, you’re hot, you should have a case of condoms.” OK, this is not a conversation I’ve ever had. After I got over it, I realized he was actually paying me a compliment. However, as casual as he was about it, I suspect it’s something he - and others of his twenty-something generation - say every weekend. And I suppose that means young women today find this ok.

I jokingly told him I wasn’t dropping eggs any more so condoms really weren’t something I invested in. “Dude, glove up or die.” Another significant difference between our respective decades. I remember the pre-AIDS world. I was having sex in the pre-AIDS world, and I’ve been married for the last twenty years. For me, condoms are still about preventing new life and for him they are about sustaining his own life.

“There’s other stuff we could do you know.” Oh dear God. Not in my old lady world. I like sex and all that goes with it as much as the next person, but this sort of “oh well, let’s scrounge around and settle for less just to get off” doesn’t work for me. It seems so unabashedly selfish. Either that or I wasn’t drunk enough to appreciate his gallant gesture.

Seriously, I’m still not sure what his last name is. I just think before you invite someone into your body, you ought to have a basic exchange of information.